Tuesday, October 12, 2010

(More) Thoughts on Circumcision

We had, long before the baby was born, hashed out whether we wanted to circumcise, and there were so many reasons not to do it, that I don't understand why people ever do.

First off, I consider myself to be a feminist, and as such, consent is something I'm very aware of in daily life. I believe children are an oppressed class, and this flows from my desire to understand the complex social caste system we have in The Western World (did that need to be capitalized?).

While there are necessary decisions parents have to make for the well-being of their children, many choices are made in that spirit without actually being necessary. Circumcision falls directly into that category. There is no reason to circumcise at an early age. That child probably would not, and definitely can not consent to having part of their genitals amputated at the age of zero; and what can it possibly hurt to at least wait until they can weigh in on such a big decision about their body?

Other issues come to mind as well. It's a painful procedure -often performed without anesthesia- which some think can cause life-long emotional scarring. It permanently destroys glands at the tip of the penis that help to protect it, shielding it from discomfort and keeping it more sensitive for a better (or at least gentler) sex life. In addition to the risks and possible complications from an unnecessary surgery, one needs to consider the medical myths that are cited as reasons to circumcise; that is, most (if not all, I'm not fresh on this subject like I once was) of the claims about positive health effects have been proven incorrect.

That said, I'm a little sad that my baby won't be the same as me. I'm circumcised, and I'm sure he'll have questions about why we're not the same. I do, however have options. The easiest course of action is to simply keep a very open dialogue about society, the pressures there from, and why we decided to let him choose what to do with his body. Another option is foreskin restoration, which has been a subject of interest for me lately. I won't go into the details for that, but it's well-documented online.

I want my son to grow up thinking that his body is his own to govern, and I also hope that he will feel the same about others, and accordingly accept people for who they are, and what they decide.

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Friday, October 8, 2010

New Arrival, Slightly Late Post

The baby is here.

The birth was incredible. I feel so fortunate to have been able to do a birth at home, with safety and comfort. I can't imagine the stress of having a baby in a hospital, because even the midwives' tiny amount of involvement made me nervous. It was really incredible, though, to watch a person come from another person. I couldn't believe it when it was happening, and I couldn't believe it after it had finished.

Now, three or so weeks into the baby being here, I can't imagine life without the baby. Every other thought is consumed with concern and interest for him, and I struggle while at work (I'm working from home, as of late) not to just get up and run into the other room every time I hear him make a noise. Fortunately, my partner is able to spend almost all of her time with him.

My days consist of working 8 hours (usually broken up into two or three hour chunks), doing a load of laundry (it was two loads of laundry a day at first), and doing the majority of the cooking and dishes. My in-laws (whose basement we occupy) have tried to help a bit, but I've been pretty adamant about getting things down as much on my own as possible.

We're not circumcising, which I consider to be a simple matter of consent. Since he can't tell us whether or not he wants part of his genitals amputated, we're going to go ahead and opt out of that for the time being. He can always remedy it later if he wants (who would want to?). The whole thing has made me wonder about my having been circumcised as a baby, and what lasting psychological effects that has had on me. I've heard of people restoring their foreskins, through a number of methods, the most appealing of which is using a weight to stretch the remaining skin over the tip of the penis. It doesn't repair the permanently damaged mucous glands that are destroyed during a circumcision, but it allows for the apparatus to function in a very similar fashion to an uncut one.

All right. The end.  Good bye.

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